The Angry Olympic Fan

Four years ago I attended the now infamous Lindsey Jacobellis gaffe that cost her a gold medal in the Snowboard Cross. I knew she fell. I knew she blew a big lead. And I knew this was horrifically embarrassing for her, but I was completely unaware at that moment that she was showboating. Considering this was the first (and until yesterday) only Snowboard cross race I'd ever seen, I had no idea that she was pulling a Deion. I thought she was supposed to do tricks after jumps.


And thus the uproar over her second Olympic flame out makes me laugh out loud. Reporters who are covering the games don't know a "switch stance" from a "fakie" (for the record-I googled "Snowboard trick terminology" and these were the first two items under that Wikipedia category). So, their efforts to be profoundly aghast at Jacobellis failing to even qualify for the final is laughable.
These are the same people who have a problem with Sadie winning Best in Show. Unless Sal Masekela is writing for the New York Times, honestly, I don't care what their NBA reporter thinks of her goof.

In the same regard, I can't seem to put my finger on why America loves to hate Johnny Weir. Truth is, he's the best thing to happen to mens figure skating since we openly discussed the health of Scott Hamltion's nut sack.

Activists are mad that Weir would dare to wear fur during his routines. Manly men are throwing epithets at their TV screens when Weir enters the ice wearing something from the Amy Adams closet on the set of "Enchanted."

Hello people, he's a figure skater and he is unapologetically effeminate. What do you want him to wear, hunting gear? Maybe he should dress a bear with his skate and wear the pelt for his long format routine.
He's a freaking figure skater, doesn't that by definition make him the gayest athlete in America? I for one want my male figure skaters to be gay. Among things many gay men are extremely proficient at: style, grace, music selection, the flare for the dramatic, and figure skating.

And I like when the US wins gold medals, even if the winner doesn't look or act anything like me. Our greatest attribute is we can (but rarely do) root for anyone in the red white and blue. Our country's pride ultimately supersedes our lame prejudices. Even the most staunch racist wouldn't dare root for the Chinese at this moment. Given the choice in Alabama: Johnny Weir or a Communist, begrudgingly Alabama overwhelmingly goes with Weir.

If Johnny Weir falls short of the gold, the only person who is actually affected by this is Johnny Weir. Truth is, he raised the bar for figure skating as a performance art. Wheaties might not put him on their box, but Grape Nuts would think about it!
And as for Jacobellis, I think her quote following a second Olympic flame out was apropos, "It's not the end of the world for me. I It's unfortunate that the rest of the world only sees this race and the one four years ago. I guess I don't have a great track record with the general public."
She couldn't have hit this more on the head. OK, she screwed up in Torino, although the public needed a semi-sober Snowboarder to explain it to us. And OK, she muffed it up in the Vancouver games too which means her name and gold medal will never be in the same sentence, but who cares? Even if she won, you are still not going to watch a snowboard cross race nor learn what the "Canadian Bacon" trick is.

These athletes work their asses off for four years to get the chance to define themselves. If they should happen to not end up a champion, it doesn't mean they've disappointed us. Here we are, a nation of lummoxes sifting through our Doritos and Twinkies upset that Lindsey Jacobellis hit a gate on her qualifying run in an event we don't even understand the rules of. Good God, has it come to that?
You want to be mad about something in the Olympic games, be mad at the USOC for the games the Dream Team lost or the inability to find 20 hockey players in this country that can have a chance at competing without being deemed Miracle Workers. But don't be mad at the competitive jump roper or figure skater or dog musher or snowboarder.
In the words of Rodney King, "Can't we all just get along?"